[December 21, 2019] There is always a price to pay for the dark-side of success. Those costs can have deteriorating and corrupting effects on one’s family and self, loss of privacy, and social isolation. Avoiding the downside to success takes on a life of its own after one reaches a point that one’s leadership reaches large numbers of people.
“Once you agree upon the price you and your family must pay for success, it enables you to ignore the minor hurts, the opponent’s pressure, and the temporary failures.” —Vince Lombardi – American football coach
A question often asked of senior leaders is, “How do you overcome the negative effects of your success?” The answers vary depending upon who is asked but there is one thing we find and that there are several themes that I will highlight today. So, how do you avoid the downside to success?
- Having a sensible family. Levelheaded, well-grounded relatives help keep your feet nailed to the ground. Those from the nuclear family, specifically, are most helpful because they are with you every day. The family keeps you in check by preventing you from falling for the temptations of fame (e.g., partying, drugs and alcohol).
- Truthful advisers. Often called mentors, such people can tell you the unvarnished, naked truth without fear. They are on the lookout for obstacles you may be tripped up by and assist with future planning, strategizing, and carrying out those plans.
- Age, maturity, and humility. Public exposure has deleterious outcomes for those that are younger and more likely immature. Success doesn’t have the same emotional overtones for an older, experienced person compared to someone younger.
- The fear of making a catastrophic mistake will keep most folks focused and on point. The fear might be of losing one’s prominent position, a satisfying lifestyle, or even family. All successful people are walking a tightrope and are aware of what happens with a misstep.
- Awareness of the dangers of success. Successful people often draw evil people into the circle of their lives that provide a variety of temptations. We have all seen politicians who are caught in sexual relationships with people, not their spouses. ‘Nuff said.
Success is an ego boost. Those gotcha moments for the successful can be all too infuriating and career-ending too. Gratefulness for success is expected but if a person is not willing to see that the deteriorating side effects of success are just around the corner, it’s only a matter of time before they will be tripped up.
Today (12/22/2019) you wrote a review of a book that slams Socialism ideology pretty hard. That says a lot about success too. It means that you must be ready to defend the good and attack the bad. The problem? Many folks – esp. the young – cannot distinguish good from bad.
You can be a univ. snowflake, a radical, an antifa, or a brainless protester. What you cannot do is defend freedom and do this at the same time. Too many simply don’t see the inconvenient problems with socialism and its sister ideologies. And, BTW, I include fascism as a sister ideology of socialism. They all are, to the mainstream thinking, not that different.
I’ve seen many successful people fall for the ‘pretty, shiny objects’ of their desires. When they get there, others are too willing to defer to their vision and with that comes a loss of humility and caring. Then comes the downfall.
The downside of success has been a subject of speculation for at least a century. In Freud’s (1925) paper about “Those Wrecked By Success,” he stated that, “people occasionally fall ill precisely when a deeply-rooted and long-cherished wish has come to fulfillment. It seems then as though they were not able to tolerate their happiness; for there can be no question that there is a causal connection between their success and their falling ill.”
Present-day success carries with it the opportunity to make stupid mistakes and unwise decisions, while everyone else can see you in your underwear on twitter.
Bryan, you scare me sometimes. LOL. ?
Another on-target article, Gen. Satterfield. Thanks. I will add that maybe, just maybe, you put the cart before the horse – so to speak. How about an article on what the “downsides” to success actually are. Please give us something on that in the near future. Thanks.
Good point, Jose and I will do that soon. Appreciate you reading my blog and being a regular contributor to the forum.
Yes, how about 1) everyone puts a microscope on your behavior, 2) you lose your privacy and your family loses their privacy as well, 3) your negatives are exaggerated, and 4) everyone wants your attention so much that it detracts from your job and family life.
Good article on this subject here — “How to Mitigate the Downside of Success”
https://www.gsb.stanford.edu/insights/how-mitigate-downside-success
Some highly successful people become miserable, self-destructive, or self-defeating.
Hi everyone, excellent analysis of a subject often avoided itself. Why should I look at the negatives of success? Well, I like the Boy Scout slogan, ‘be prepared.’ If we are prepared, then success will work out okay for us. Otherwise, expect a downfall.
I never gave this even a second thought. I just assumed that success in itself was good. But there are downsides to success too. Thanks for a meaningful blog on this topic. Oh, and Merry Christmas to all for next week.
Yes, and also Happy Hanukkah to all my Jewish friends.
http://www.israelhebrew.com/hanukkah-greetings/
We are entering the traditional holiday season; that has been observed for a variety of reasons since the beginning of mankind. I like to think of those from the past who helped make us a better people. So, thanks! I also wanted to note that the subject of today’s article, “Avoiding the Downside to Success” is something you will not see much. Why? That I believe is because success is never clearly defined. Oh well, my input anyway.
Interesting comment, Linus Man. Have a great holiday.
Good way to handle things!
I say “Merry Christmas” to everyone, I’m Christian. My Jewish friends say “Happy Hanukkah” to everyone. Easy, respectful, and shows we are mature, thinking adults. The weasels who are insulted are just babies to be pitied. Thank you General Satterfield for another great article.