[February 2, 2018] Good leaders have many friends. Great leaders have true friends. Some say that the best way to succeed in one’s profession is to have a wide network of folks who are helpful. Such a network can be tapped for information, advice, and encouragement. Yet, what the network can rarely provide, something only true friends can, is that they honestly care about the leader.
My daughter, a few months ago, showed me her Facebook page and noted with pride that she had over 400 “friends.” Some of these folks she barely knew but she had counted them as friends nonetheless. Her description of friendship differs from mine because, in my opinion, a true friend is someone who cares deeply about you enough to stick by you in the most difficult of circumstances.
“A real friend is one who walks in when the rest of the world walks out.” – Walter Winchell, American newspaper and radio gossip commentator
True friends can help improve your leadership but don’t have to be expert leaders themselves. It’s not easy because that means a friend has to be honest with you about your weaknesses and strengths. They have to have the sticktoitiveness – the dogged perseverance and persistence – to ensure the leader is on the right path and stays there.
Here are a few things that true friends do to improve one’s leadership. They may not have the extensive experience or skill sets of someone in the leader’s profession but they possess something deeper.
1. Build confidence and ensure you have ‘heart in the game.’
2. Keep you focused on the important; like family, faith, and country.
3. Provide motivation and guidance to avoid common ethical pitfalls and social obstacles.
4. Be a sounding board for concerns, ideas, and problems.
5. Are always there for you, believe in you, and when necessary advocate for you.
6. Prevent you from going astray; morally, legally, and socially.
7. Help connect you with more in your professional network.
8. Work with you to correct your weaknesses and improve upon your strengths.
9. Are always available for you.
10. … and finally, they listen to your fears, frustrations, and also your joys in life without judgment.
This is not unlike the mentor described in an earlier post here on this leadership blog where I listed 10 things a great mentor can do for you (see link here). The difference is that a true friend is not someone who simply passes through your life with little inkling about you but one who is willing to put you first over their own interests.
By the way, it’s Groundhog Day for those of us in the U.S. and Punxsutawney Phil (the groundhog) just saw his shadow; indicating more winter weather.
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