Letters to My Granddaughter, No. 88

By | August 9, 2024

[August 9, 2024]  I left home at 17 and I was gone before my High School graduation because I was enrolled in college and taking classes, a couple of weeks before my friends walked across the High School graduation stage at home in Abilene, Texas.  I imagined in my mind my friends with their parents hugging each other, taking group pictures, and having “non-alcoholic” parties (or so I was told).  

In that summer of 1970 at TTU, I volunteered to help in a soup kitchen, to fill something missing in my life.  I’d left all my family and friends behind. I was nervous that first academic year, not knowing how to navigate the complexity of a university degree, figuring out what was what and who was who, all this new to me. Like so many folks, we fall back on what we learn growing up. 

I’d learned that helping your neighbor was a noble cause to pursue. This drove me to seek out a way to fulfill my soul and it was Helen’s soup kitchen that caught my eye and where I could lend a hand when needed.  I thought, “Would they need me?”  Being so young, I knew nothing about soup kitchens.

My first plan was to put in three or four hours a week to help those less fortunate than me. I had little money, my time though had some value. It was not easy or fun doing volunteer work, plus college coursework.  A woman called Helen from a nearby Church of Christ congregation asked me some basic questions like, “Can you cook?”  “How many hours can you work?”  Basic stuff. What surprised me with her questioning was her side comments.  “We can’t support our needy, so you can best help by starting right now, this minute.” 

Not even an hour later, I’d been “trained” in the art and science of cooking, drug and alcohol counseling, and the elements of overnight support for at-risk patrons, mostly the elderly and the drug dependent. The elderly were the most sad because we knew there were many mental problems in this group. We were warned about the druggies, they were untrustworthy and oftentimes dangerous. All of them always wanted hot food and plenty of it, so I figured I was safe. 

Helen was a real go-getter.  She arranged for food and money donations, easy access to a large kitchen and eating utensils, as well as overseeing all the helpers. Helen devoted all her time to make sure the indigent got simple but balanced meals and shelter. “Just the basics,” she would say. And it all made sense to me.  My first job was as the mainline cook, not the apprentice, not the assistant, but THE cook. I had no experience, but I was happy she would ask, so I said “yes.”  

Cory was a cute young girl, about my age, who started working there shortly before I arrived.  Cory cooked with me.  She was fit, friendly, and feminine, just what all regular guys appreciate in any relationship. And Helen was ecstatic having Cory and me in the kitchen working as a team. Unlike I had planned, I worked two 10-hour shifts on weekends. My grades didn’t suffer much (that would change later), but I did feel good about what I was doing, and now I had my first college-aged girlfriend. 

Helen taught me a few essential lessons.  “Never forget these lessons, they will come in handy, young college boy.”

Treat people right, even if they are poor and called the “invisible members of society.”  Learn to motivate yourself and other people.  Find what people like and make the most of it.  Never take “no” for an answer.  If someone says it’s impossible, prove them wrong.  Work hard, be honest, be kind, tell the truth, be on time and be ready to work immediately.  Be prepared for what can go wrong.  Always have a plan.  And, have a backup plan if things go all wrong. Be thankful for what you have.  Be humble for what you have. Be real.  Don’t fake it. 

I wrote these lessons down long ago.  Helen was a real philosopher – not really, but she did know people.  She also knew and understood the Holy Bible (to her, the best text about people ever written).  I never told anyone about my work at the soup kitchen, but Helen and her volunteers taught me a great deal about being a real human and a good man in the soup kitchen.

—————

Please read my books:

  1. “55 Rules for a Good Life,” on Amazon (link here).
  2. “Our Longest Year in Iraq,” on Amazon (link here).
Author: Douglas R. Satterfield

Hello. I provide one article every day. My writings are influenced by great thinkers such as Friedrich Nietzsche, Karl Jung, Aleksandr Solzhenitsyn, Jean Piaget, Erich Neumann, and Jordan Peterson, whose insight and brilliance have gotten millions worldwide to think about improving ourselves. Thank you for reading my blog.

26 thoughts on “Letters to My Granddaughter, No. 88

  1. Army Vet

    There are many ways to become a better person, IMHO. What I see as the most common route is that when a person is young, they are involved in helping others. It gives them a chance to see others, the worst and best in human behavior. And, learn how to deal with them. Dangerous or helpful. Good or Bad. Polite or nasty. Those are the things you will see and learn to integrate how they act into your rucksack of survival solutions.

    Reply
    1. Randy Goodman

      Yep. And reading this blog and Gen. Satterfield’s books have helped put me on the right path. But I have to do the work and stay on the right path.

      Reply
  2. Wellington McBeth👀

    Wow Wow Wow, Gen. Satterfield sir, thank you for this letter. I’m learning more about what makes you who you are and why you are both compassionate and strong at the same time. These are two traits that are necessary for great leadership.

    Reply
  3. Paulette Johnson

    Gen. Satterfield continues to give us a great gift that lays out his mental and physical formation from young child to when he departs for college. These letters have given me the motivation to begin jotting down my own childhood experiences, the good, the bad, and the crazy. Already the narratives have helped me come to terms with many of my demons and now I get better rest and feel more refreshed during the day. Now, Gen. Satterfield has not labeled that as a benefit but it works for me. I suggest u try it.

    Reply
    1. Winston

      I came to read this letter to find out more of this too, Paulette. Get rid of your demons. Read his book too “55 Rules for a Good Life” and it will help you with these demons.

      Reply
  4. The Golly Woman from EHT

    The personal lessons learned. A departure from other letters and I like it.

    Reply
  5. Yusaf from Texas

    Gen. S hits another home run with his most recent letter. I’m printing them out and putting them into my notebook for my friends to read when they come over.

    Reply
    1. Lou Schmerconish

      I will do the same and am keeping them in a notebook for reading again later when I have time. These letters, for some reason, simply draw me into them. My upbringing was in Chicago on the city streets, so my experiences were radically different. I’m glad that I can read more about what made Gen. Satterfield a good man, and that means learning also about his struggles too. Yusaf, you are also from Texas, so you just might have a better idea of what he means when he writes about Texas. I’m sure you find it funny and the entertainment worthwhile.

      Reply
  6. Greek Senator

    Another beautiful and lovely letter to Gen. Satterfield’s granddaughter and one that I enjoyed reading. This entire series has been great and is the top-rated series on his website. https://www.theleadermaker.com is a great place to get these letters and a great place to learn and be entertained. Gen. Satterfield, please keep your articles and this site growing. It is the first place each morning that I come to see what is posted. 👍

    Reply
    1. Alexandra

      🇬🇷 Χαιρετισμούς από την Ελλάδα 🇬🇷

      Reply
  7. Pastor John 🙏

    We can continue to see how his religion is influencing Gen. S. and maybe at the margins or maybe more fundamentally so much that it is hard to determine. But his Southern Baptist roots are showing. God Bless Gen. Satterfield.

    Reply
  8. Kenny Foster

    Sir, well written I’m sure your granddaughter will love this letter. She just might be seeing her time as she approaches 17 years old what to expect and not fear.

    Reply
  9. Nuevo Byrd

    Gen. Satterfield is not shy about telling us about his fears. Remember that he grew up in a relaxing Deep South environment that today we would consider “poor” but he says he was “rich” (not economically rich but family rich). Here is a para that says a lot about him ….
    “In that summer of 1970 at TTU, I volunteered to help in a soup kitchen, to fill something missing in my life. I’d left all my family and friends behind. I was nervous that first academic year, not knowing how to navigate the complexity of a university degree, figuring out what was what and who was who, all this new to me. Like so many folks, we fall back on what we learn growing up. “

    Reply
    1. Cow Blue

      Great point, Nuevo Byrd. I do think that his “transition” article from the Deep South to Texas was a massive cultural shock and one that perhaps made Gen. S. a better person even if it was highly stressful for him. In his own admission, that was a time of great difficulty.

      Reply
    1. Pen Q

      Vanguard, that we have asked for on a number of occasions and I do not believe that Gen. S. has given an answer or maybe he is just hedging his bets and getting feedback on his letters. I hope he does write a book because his last book was published a couple of years ago. We are overdue a book. Just me thinking out loud. Please Please Please continue with ur letters, Gen. Satterfield.

      Reply
  10. H. M. Longstreet

    Letter #88 from the deep mind of Gen. Satterfield and we keep on getting these wonderful, loving, insightful, happy (no strike that, satisfying) letters that tell his granddaughter about his early life, so far up to being a freshman in college in Texas. Gen. Satterfield, we are getting close to letter 100 and like others have said before, please continue writing these letters about the good and the bad and the ways that you made yourself a better person. thanks!!!!!!!!!!!!!

    Reply
  11. Melissa Jackson

    Right up there with the very best of Gen. Satterfield’s letters and he gets a girlfriend.

    Reply
    1. Liz at Home

      ❤❤❤❤❤ Everyone wants to know if it was love at first sight. ❤❤❤❤❤

      Reply
      1. Bernie

        Liz, yep! Must have been or Gen. S would not have written about it.

        Reply
      2. DaveV

        Hmmmmmmmmmm, nope. Read more of his letters to get to his later years.

        Reply
        1. British Citizen

          Read his lessons and learn. And read his book “55 Rules for a Good Life.”

          Treat people right, even if they are poor and called the “invisible members of society.” Learn to motivate yourself and other people. Find what people like and make the most of it. Never take “no” for an answer. If someone says it’s impossible, prove them wrong. Work hard, be honest, be kind, tell the truth, be on time and be ready to work immediately. Be prepared for what can go wrong. Always have a plan. And, have a backup plan if things go all wrong. Be thankful for what you have. Be humble for what you have. Be real. Don’t fake it. – Gen. Doug Satterfield

          Reply

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