[June 18, 2016] As a very junior officer I had a grizzled old Platoon Sergeant working for me. I was more than fortunate to have him on my team and all the young soldiers learned a great deal from his experiences. One day he caught me complaining about the mess hall food – like all soldiers do – and impressed upon me the lesson that real leaders never complain.
The next day I was assigned to be the Food Service Officer with the responsibility to oversee all dining facility operations. Wow, I sure did learn a lot from that point on. But it was not the details of food storage, preparation, serving, disposal, cleanliness that was at the top of the list but the role of leadership that ensured every soldier was served a nutritious meal and that it was served anywhere, anytime, and any place in an organization with a mission to go into combat on short notice.
That experience and the embarrassment of complaining was about something that I actually had control over. Leaders should never complain because they have the inherent responsibility to do something to correct problems even when not in their purview. My Platoon Sergeant told me that only children have a right to complain – some call it whining – because they have no power and no control over their situation; leaders do have it.
Complaining, I learned, is an immature reaction to events that may (or may not) be in your control. For a leader it is irrelevant that a problem may not be within our control. When a leader complains it means that the leader has lost control and has reverted to an immature position. Any leader who complains is simply not a good leader. Everyone who witnesses a leader complaining knows it too. That is why leaders should choose their words carefully so that they don’t appear to be complaining and thus seen as juvenile.
We have all seen politicians who complain about many things. Their actions however speak loudly. Rarely do politicians actually do something meaningful that resolves a problem or issue but they are big complainers. Military leaders, on the other hand, are experts at fixing things and not complaining. No surprise also that when the American public rates their confidence in each of these institutions, the military far exceeds politicians in all measures of trust and confidence.
My Platoon Sergeant was a great leader and it was sad for me to see him retire after 30 years of service to the nation. What he knew and his ability to mentor was superb. What I learned and took to heart was that real leaders never complain.
Oh, I learned my lesson and never complained about anything again.
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