[July 25, 2016] A good friend of mine at my commissioning ceremony as a new U.S. Army Second Lieutenant said that his best advice for me to succeed would be to respect soldiers regardless of rank, however pander to none of them. In his own way, he was speaking about respect. But respect is specifically missing from most social interactions and I think it is the last frontier for good leaders to explore.
In the past here at theLeaderMaker.com I’ve written about the importance of having and showing respect to others. From American Indians1 to Warriors of old2, I’ve written that their credo is based on respect for everyone: enemy and friend alike. That disrespect drives workplace dysfunction3 and toxic leadership is part of the problem.4 And that more often than not, leaders promote disrespect among those who depend upon them.5
This is certainly no secret to those who have any interest in leadership yet I find it disconcerting that so many leaders are prone to lack this important character trait of respect for others. Regular readers will remember when I talked about my two priorities (during peacetime) as a senior military leader: 1) good quality training and 2) taking care of soldiers and their families. The latter of course being based on respect. Why it is not widely accepted is difficult for me to understand.
Difficult for me to understand because the advantages are many and disadvantages almost nonexistent. For the narcissist, the lack of respect for others is a given and the difficulties they will encounter in life is significantly higher than for leaders who have and do show respect; emphasis on “show” respect. One can possess no respect for other people but if you show respect by following a few basic rules, then that will suffice. However, such a situation is indeed rare.
Showing respect is the key to a successful leadership. One can show respect for the enemy by learning everything that’s possible to know about them; something the U.S. government has failed to do, for example, with Islamic extremists. Showing respect does not require one to like another person or group of people. Famous baseball player Jackie Robinson once said that he wasn’t concerned about people liking or disliking him, all he required was that people respected him as a human being.
I’m told that the lack of respect people show today is a cultural trend, especially in Western societies but is beginning to take hold also in Asian societies. Why that is the case will certainly be debated but the greatest leaders will resist the urge to succumb to it. Perhaps it’s true that respect is the last frontier.
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- https://www.theleadermaker.com/the-virtues-of-the-sioux-indian/
- https://www.theleadermaker.com/virtues-of-the-warrior/
- https://www.theleadermaker.com/workplace-dysfunctions-disrespect-and-anger/
- https://www.theleadermaker.com/toxic-leadership-respect-and-moral-courage/
- https://www.theleadermaker.com/leader-trends-promote-disrespect/