[September 6, 2024] One of the advantages of being a General Officer in the U.S. Army (or Flag Officer as often called) is that we can go just about anywhere, create our own schedule, pick and choose training events to observe, and of course, eat when and where we want. I was pleasantly surprised one day when a Major General (MG) was told, “Sorry, General, but you can’t eat here.”
I smiled when the Army buck sergeants eating lunch in our headquarters’ Dining Facility (DFAC, pronounced Dee-Fack) told this two-star he was not welcome at their table. I thought that this was a rather bold thing to do. Yet, Soldiers can eat with who they want and – although not advisable – they can tell just about anyone they don’t want to eat with them. And expect that person to comply.
It was a long week with range training, physical fitness tests, and counseling sessions, but the Army Conference on Training brought many Flag Officers into the unit’s headquarters. Generals were everywhere and poking their heads into classrooms, offices, and DFACs to see what was going on. With so many senior officers present, I would have thought that the Generals would find something more constructive to do and eat with the other Generals or perhaps senior officers.
As many of my peers in the Army know, I make it a point to eat with enlisted Soldiers; the lower the rank, the better. That’s why I was initially taken aback when one of the buck sergeants brushed off this MG. Yes, and I did smile to myself, suppressing an overt laugh that nearly escaped my lips. You see, this 2-star General was a pain in the butt, showed little regard for his Soldiers, and often snubbed his men. The perception was that this MG was a snob and careerist.
I was waiting in line behind a Staff Sergeant who was about to interfere, to do a public dressing down of these sergeants. I asked him to let it go because I had something better in mind.
Upon receiving my lunch on a plastic tray, with plastic forks and water in a plastic cup, I walked over to these sergeants and sat down. “May I join you?” Their reply nearly in unison, “Yes sir, please do.” And don’t think this MG didn’t notice. I could feel his eyes in the back of my head.
We had a wonderful discussion about where these men were from, their girlfriends, and typical small talk, as well as I listened closely to a few complaints about that week’s workload. That is what I had hoped to achieve.
Looking back upon the lunch, I would rate it as successful. I learned the names of several Soldiers and got another look at what it means to be a junior NCO in today’s Army. I was authentically interested and believed these men could tell that in me. Nothing is worse than being inauthentic. NCOs can detect B.S. from a hundred miles away with closed eyes and ears.
If you want to get a good idea of the morale of a military unit (or business, college campus, government office), eat with those toward the lower end of the rank curve. Learn to listen to them and do so honestly and ask good questions. Small talk helps set the stage but being able to relate to them is not always easy but necessary to get NCOs to talk.
I’m proud that I could go anywhere and eat a meal with any Soldier, regardless of rank, without any problem whatsoever. NCOs regularly invited me to their tables. They approached me. And the reason is that MGs like the one here had proven themselves to be jerks and you can’t just stop being a jerk because the reputation of a jerk keeps on going like the Energizer Bunny.
Treat others in such a way that they know you respect them but also that you can help them out if needed. I had a reputation for helping Soldiers, rewarding them properly, counseling them when needed, and treating them fairly. I can look back and say my methods of reaching out to Soldiers worked.
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Wow, army buck sergeants telling a general what to do. Must have come as a shocker to that general. Sir, I appreciate your articles and I really love your articles on “Letters to My Granddaughter.” Keep your website going for another 11 years. And congrats on your anniversary. 👍
Yepper! Gotta just love this blog.
Gen. Satterfield, thank you for this enlightening article and yes I did get a big chuckle out of it. Only those who have spent time in the military can truly understand the depth of what you’ve written because of how the rules are set and how the military subculture arranges our daily lives. Well done! Great story.
I spent 8 years in the Army back in the early 2000s. And during those times we were fighting wars in Iraq and Afghanistan soon after 911. Time for B.S. – bullshit – was over. We knew what we had to do and that was to be a lethal fighting force. No more time for patty cake behavior from anybody, especially from some General who wanted to be “with the boys.” It would have been insulting for us to have this jerk MG sitting with us. On the other hand, we wanted to be associated with those senior NCOs and senior Officers who were seen as being smart, articulate, and successful. Rank didn’t matter that much. Leadership style can tell you alot about that person and how they treat the lower ranks. Some Flag Officers think they are the cat’s meow, well, they aren’t and that’s that. Gen. Satterfield, thanks for you telling this story. It certainly brings back memories – mostly good memories – of my time in the US Army.
Another article giving us a little insight into the US Army and into the thinking of Gen. Satterfield. GOOD.
Sir, I laughed when I read this para, “I’m proud that I could go anywhere and eat a meal with any Soldier, regardless of rank, without any problem whatsoever. NCOs regularly invited me to their tables. They approached me. And the reason is that MGs like the one here had proven themselves to be jerks and you can’t just stop being a jerk because the reputation of a jerk keeps on going like the Energizer Bunny.” – Gen. Doug Satterfield. That is one of the reasons I read your website each day. Today is a good pick-me-up!!!!!! 🇺🇸
Well said, American Girl. I too thought “great line” that gives us an idea on Gen. S’s leadership style.
😜🤦♀️👀😁👍🤣 Gotta give those NCOs a big hand for being standup guys! 👏👏👏👏👏
Looks like a BOLD strategy by these NCOs, but I wouldn’t recommend it for a long-term way of getting ahead.
Army Capt, yes I was thinking the same thing. But hey, if they don’t want a “jerk” at their table, then that’s their business. I spent a lot of time in mess halls ( as Gen. Satterfield calls them, on occasion ) and that is a time you want to spend relaxing a bit and having a good time with your buddies. No one tells you to eat with anyone and that is the way it should be. Thanks Gen. Satterfield for you retelling of this story, a story that certainly made me smile. Oh, PS, this Major General should have thought to himself WHY he was told not to sit there. And yes, he could have forced it, but that would of course defeated his reasoning to being with.
Correct Shawn and Army Captain. There is a special way of who and when you have a meal. Breaking that tradition is done at your own risk. Looks like the MG got rejected.
Good points. And I do think this is the same subculture thinking across Western nations.
🤦♂️ Gen. Satterfield, thank you for making me laugh this morning. 🤦♀️